the justifcation of "eating our emotions"

So...I told myself earlier this morning (6 a.m) that I would set my alarm and arise at 10. Did that happen? No of course not.

We can just assume though that my intentions were there, and the given my lack of sleep it would be more appropriate to wake at 11...and maybe if I push it, noon. Instead I wake at let's say. 1:30...just to check my random texts from friends, and then once again fall back into an un-wakeable slumber. I wake up at 5.

So maybe today is just one of those days, where getting up at the wee crack of dawn just isn't going to happen. I then layed in bed another hour facebook stalking my friends into submission, and then editing photo's that should've been edited ages ago. There is a recurring pattern here.

I also think that my title is not fitting at all, because in no way have I even begun to explain why eating our feelings is ok.

Anyways I tried to become a bit productive today by, not showering and making my way out the door to the grocery store located ever so close to my apt.

What did I buy?
Apple Cider, Chobani Yogurt, Non-fat pinapple cottage cheese (it's an addicition), Lu "herbes du provence" crackers, penne noodles, artichokes, diced tomatoes, ...caviar? , CINIMAN RAISON BAGELS!!! , strawberry cream cheese, grapes, and ice cream.

Most of these purchases we're probably not benificial to my health let alone worth the expense, however, I felt the need to buy crackers and caviar to satisfy the old queen listening to Billy Holiday while sipping a glass of red and smoking a mild cigarette, in black satin gloves, and an outdated dress, topped with a heinous fur hat. (I used to get in trouble with run on sentences in college...I may still have that problem).

So that being said, I did down the entire pint of Hagen Daaz, and had a couple crackers with caviar, and yes smoked a dunhill. I was missing the outfit, but I think my mindset primarily completed the feeling. Justification, no...however I do think that it was semi-relieveing after a long day backstage at loris dirons "luna park" fashion show in Brooklyn for the Housewives of new york. I can't tell you how many greenhouse boys graced that event, all wearing a-morir sunglasses and some statement piece that exempts them from living in reality.

There are however almost 2 hours left in the day for me to find something to do with my life other than facebook stalking and pretending that somewhere in this world is the answer that will make me wholesome, and a bit less jaded.

<3dvs